"Brothers" (2009, 2020)

As mentioned in an earlier post, around 2008, I started writing some stand-alone songs without a collaborator. I worked pretty diligently at this for about a year and accumulated a growing catalog of early work ("Nicholas" was among the first). One of the last songs in this stretch was a piece called "Brothers."

I had long wanted to write a song about my college years, particularly about my fraternity life. I decided to narrow it down to my relationship with my fraternal big brother, Scott Peek. In my family, I was the oldest and the big brother, so having a brotherly mentor of my own was a new and wonderful experience.

I met Peek on my first day of jazz band rehearsals when I was a college freshman. He was a few years older. Both of us were sax players; I played alto, and he played tenor. Over the course of the school year, we hit it off. He was active in Greek Life and encouraged me to consider joining.

The next fall, I did so, and we became "brothers." My fraternity experience is something I'll cherish forever. I became very active, served in an office, endured personal challenges, and gained life lessons that I carry with me still. Fraternity life is a crucible. It brings out the best in a person and exposes the worst. It forces one to grapple with both extremes, to find balance, and, in our case, to maintain high ideals and move ever upward toward achieving them.

Scott (Peek, as I call him) and I forged a deep bond in this crucible. During his final summer months of college, the two of us lived together in a mobile home on my grandparents' land in Bells, Tennessee. We had very little, but the experience of two young men entering adult life was powerful. Sometimes lean times are the most transformative. That summer, things in my personal life began to collapse, and I had one of the earliest bouts of depression and unsteadiness I'd experienced. Peek held me up and kept me moving forward. I'll never forget that.

Our lives have drifted about in the years since, but our bond has never diminished. I love and respect him beyond measure, and no matter how our individual stories unfold, we'll always be brothers. That's what I hoped to capture in 2009. On the day before Thanksgiving, I wrote a lyric called "Brothers." Here's the original version: LINK

I wanted it to be heartfelt, but not nostalgic. I didn't want it to be all about "remember when," but about what is left once the shared experience is only a memory. I also needed to express my gratitude. I've learned that time moves on, but brotherly love endures and deepens. I've come to appreciate it more with time.

In the lyric, true to form, there are tinges of religious imagery. I kept the story somewhat vague and esoteric so it might have a broader appeal while still retaining elements that were deeply personal. For instance, the line from the chorus that references the biblical quote, "whatsoever things are true," serves a double function. It can be read at face value, and it is also part of our university's alma mater, a piece that, as student musicians, we came to know well.

After finishing the lyrics, I tried to set them to music a couple of times but could never settle on a melody. It existed as what some would call a "naked song" for years, until 2020. That year, my collaborator, composer Matt Glickstein, and I were toying around with the idea of writing an album of original songs with a theatrical influence, though not part of any show. We wrote a few things, but eventually moved on from the project. However, as part of that unrealized endeavor, I gave Matt the lyrics to "Brothers," along with some revisions, and he finally gave it a melody, which I loved.

The song was never properly demoed, but I've always been fond of it. In fact, it's one of my favorite things Matt and I have written together.

As a lyric, it lived for eleven years without music and remained "in the drawer" for six more years after it was given a melody.

After all that time, this journal project gave me the inspiration to finally make a proper demo.

"Brothers"

music by Matt Glickstein
lyrics by Jason Spraggins

We loved the life when times were lean,
brothers bound by ties unseen.

We bared our souls and shared our wine.
You chased love, I lost my mind.

We often froze in search of heat

Inside our home and on the street.

As time passed through the hourglass, 

we lived free, and we lived fast.

Though brothers then and brothers still, 

At different altars we now kneel.

Still, you see me and I see you

in whatsoever things are true.

In hallowed halls, we gathered dust.

We fought a war; we learned to trust. 

We faced the dark and seized the day.

We heard the bells beyond the fray.

Though brothers then and brothers still, 

at different altars we now kneel.

Still, you see me and I find you

in whatsoever things are true.

Our swords were sharp; our hearts were brave.
We fought for dreams we could not save.
You turned your light upon the night, 

and helped restore my failing sight.

Though brothers then and brothers still, 

at different altars we now kneel.

Still, you see me and I find you

in whatsoever things are true.  

*The updated demo was created from the original demo recordings and sheet music using a combination of virtual instruments and AI-assisted production and vocal recreation. The recording follows the original melody, harmony, and arrangement and is intended as a faithful, expanded recreation of the original composition. It is presented here solely as a demonstration of concept and as part of an ongoing effort to curate, catalog, and preserve the work.